I once grabbed a large rock from the garden and hit it a couple of times with a chisel and a hammer, but I don’t think that counts as “Interest in Sculpture”. With nothing to lose, and potentially a life to regain, I started the long, arduous process of remembering what I was interested in as a child. As with everything with me, this proved to be a dramatic ordeal. I read an article by James Altucher once that I can no longer find (if anyone knows, can you link me in the comments?) where he talked about thinking back to what you used to do as a child to rediscover your passions. It also means that once you make a choice, you’d be sacrificing a whole bunch of other disciplines you will no longer have the time to pursue. Which makes it super hard to figure out exactly what you want to do. Since it was easy enough to get mediocre at it, they lose interest super quick and then move on to the next shiny thing. There are people in this world that get mildly good at a lot of things, and then they stop learning. Tell Me What You Want What You Really Really Want I needed to figure out what I wanted, and I needed to do it by myself. I don’t have a Keira Knightley available, so that plan was out. In the movie, however, Sparrow tricks Kiera Knightley’s character into wanting what he wants and then gives her the compass, so it would lead her to it, and he can follow. “The wine is never gone”, France would answer. If I had that compass it would spin wildly, and much like Captain Jack Sparrow, it would cause me no small amount of anxiety again, and I’d be back on the bottle.
I’ve loved those films for the longest time - FIGHT ME - so in between horrible Jack Sparrow impressions and wobbly walking, I would think about their themes, message, and tone.Īt one point I asked myself if I had that compass, where would it point?Īnd I realised that much like Captain Jack Sparrow’s conflict in the second movie, I didn’t know where I wanted to go. Instead, it points to the thing you want the most. See, in the original Pirates of the Caribbean trilogy, the compass is this magical object that doesn’t point North. May you all find what you really want so you can point your ship in that direction”. I got up in the middle of the room during New Year’s Eve, raised my glass and said “To Jack Sparrow’s compass. So about a year and a half ago, on December 31st 2016, I decided enough was enough. Yeah ok, but do I really want to draw? Or would I rather just stare at my phone for like 5 hours?įacebook is like heroin. “Well just sit down and draw then”, they’d say. It’s hard for some people to get going when they don’t know where they’re supposed to be going in the first place.
And your screen just says “No Caller ID”. It’s like being hired for a job, being told you’re supposed to be there at 9 with your laptop and some coffee, and then them hanging up the phone before you can ask where the office building is.Īnd they failed to give you their phone number. There’s not a lot of advice on where we’re supposed to be showing up. Learning about your craft every day so that compound learning kicks in and you eventually become a master. Doing the work you want to do every day until it becomes second nature. Half the advice on productivity and creativity I see these days revolves around “showing up”. Draw what? To learn what? To get where? My mind was a messy collection of storm clouds and nondescript people standing in the rain, waiting for the bus. And they were not so much projects as they were vague ideas. The list of a thousand projects had shrunk to…like two. Here’s the larger problem though: I didn’t know what I wanted to do! If I can’t finish any of them what’s the point of even starting right? I would look forward to Friday to get wasted on French wine, so I’d have an excuse to spend the rest of the weekend at home nursing a hangover. However, a year and a half ago, those thousands of projects had all but disappeared. I’ve seen people slave away in a 9 to 5 forever for less. “Why? Only cause I never finish what I start and it makes me feel useless, lazy and like I will never amount to anything?” I’ve finished very few of them, which is how my therapist first surmised I might have a small case of anxiety. I’ve always been a person with a thousand projects in my head.
#JACK SPARROW COMPASS MOVIE#
Like a movie with super subtle analogies where the sad people are in black and white. I suppose I knew I wasn’t even having fun with the things that always brought me joy. I knew it, but I didn’t realise it at the same time. What once sounded like a cool an edgy idea, could now be a washed-up, alcoholic idea.Ī year and a half ago, I was depressed, unmotivated, and ready to settle for a life of “Netflix tonight again? Sounds like fun”. Here’s a tip: Don’t sit on stories you want to write for too long.
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